Sunday, January 25, 2009

Art Blog: Facing the FEELINGS

Ok. I feel it right now. This is how it starts. It is true an old dog can learn new tricks. At least, I can try. When I got up this morning, I was very droopy. I looked around at my projects and didn’t want to do any kind of work at all. I thought about upcoming deadlines and didn’t get a spark of energy. I just didn’t care.

Back when I went to a therapist, she would ask “What happened Sheree?” I don’t have a therapist now. So I asked myself the same question for FREE. “What happened Sheree?” I know what happened. I got rejected from that stupid show yesterday. Right now my emotional state is going through its tantrum. I am figuratively kicking the dirt and punching walls. Like I said yesterday, this REJECT email hit me doubly hard because I have been trying to get my work in that gallery for three years. Obviously, it ain’t happening.

Rationally, I know the jury process is subjective and a matter of personal taste. I know for sure, my work is of a quality which qualifies to be in that gallery. When I have seen shows there, I have seen good work and I have seen art that truly sucks. So, I know it isn’t me. I just don’t like being told NO. I don’t like feeling I am not a part of their clique. I don’t like being an outsider.
It is about feeling UNWANTED.

If you have ever been rejected, you surely understand. It can be even more frustrating when your art is rejected because our art is an extension of ourselves. So it is like being hit in the face twice. So now I am taking the pulse. Instead of going into a month long tailspin, I am telling myself to just move on. Sometimes, this is hard to do, but I just have to do this. I don’t have any more time or tears to waste.

Screw that gallery.
Sorry. I had to get it out of me. LOL LOL LOL


Photo Credit: Baboon, Creative Commons

6 comments:

namastenancy said...

Rejection sucks! I've never dealt with it well and you'd think I could, since I have an almost unbroken record of rejections. I bought myself a voodoo doll and work out some of the fury by pinning the name of the rejecting galley/show/person to the doll and stabbing it with a hat pin. Then, I laugh because it's so silly. Joanne Mattera has a good piece in her blog about what advice you'd give to new artists. I guess one of the pieces of advice I'd give would be "learn how to handle rejection."

deb said...

Yeah! Screw that gallery, they don't deserve you!!!

JafaBrit's Art said...

sorry :( I know how you feel. I came to a decision yesterday and posted about it today. I am tired of trying, I just want to do.

The way I see it sherree I have decided,I don't need to bust my backside getting into galleries or get solo exhibits, I already have a way for people to see my work -on the street or on the net).

Yes move on, and keep sharing your wonderful work with the world because there are plenty who want to see it.

Sheree Rensel said...

Nancy,
One of the things that is bothering me now about rejection is I am mad at myself for being hurt by it. I mean I have been an artist for a long time. I should be over this by now. However, it still hurts like an open wound every time I get a new rejection letter.

For me, it has gone in cycles. I have had golden times when I went years without rejection. I have been in a rocky spot lately. I like the golden times better. LOL LOL

I went and read Mattera's piece about rejection. In fact, I responded in her comment section. I told about my WORST rejection. Weirdly as I was writing it, I was laughing out loud.

I think I am a hot mess!! LOL LOL

Sheree Rensel said...

Jaf,
Oh gosh. That is exactly how I feel right now. BACKSLIDING! I too see the internet as a way around the pitfalls. In fact, on the first line of my resume exhibition record, I note my website as my "gallery". However, this seems so cheesy to me sometimes. You know?

Sheree Rensel said...

Deb,
Oh. I have thought about that. It still pissed me off that I got rejected.
LOL LOL LOL LOL